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( This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead??? )

aren't we all on the inside?

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oh shit james you're getting deep over there
i don't even know what the fuck kind it was
besides "bird"
the kind who thinks my eyes are a tasty treat i fuckin guess

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is it deep
or just the unfortunate reality of existing in the modern era

my bet is seagulls
they eat everything they think is food

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maybe
that modern era existential dread shit really got to you huh

aren't they all big and white though
it wasn't white
it was.... i dunno
bird colored
brownish greyish whatever

[counterstep]

well
the ww2 existential dread never really left
so

big and white is what I would describe a penguin to be and not a seagull

also saying bird colored like penguins don't exist is p rude
esp when we visited them personally
the penguin mayor isn't going to like this, Alexander

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my bad
i guess it was all kinda downhill from there
as a society

the batman villain???
it FLEW at me so i feel pretty safe saying it wasn't a penguin

[counterstep]

well
it's better
a lot better
but only in certain ways

penguins only want us to think they can't fly, you know
it's the whole trick of it

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better how?

okay but
do you think penguins would attack my eyes
i'm not a fish james

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people don't have to suffer as much physically anymore
struggling now is still struggling less than what it had meant before

though it's at the cost of suffering mentally instead so
I'm not saying that's perfect or something

wait you're not a fish???? what??????
omg
why didn't you tell me sooner????

( is that enough question marks to indicate sarcasm? he can't tell. )

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yeah that makes sense though, i think
it's kinda like a tent or something... you fix one thing, the other things start collapsing and getting fucked

i know i keep acting like a shark and biting you for fun but yeah, believe it or not 🤷🏻

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I mean
that just sounds more like you need more experience with tents
tbh

wow and here I was thinking you were actually a landshark

I've been bamboozled and now I don't know how to feel

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i went camping once
wasn't for me

well however you feel
don't sic anymore birds on me
i looked it up and i think it was a mockingbird
if it comes after me again i'll give it something to mock about i fucking swear

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oh
I like camping

I mean I think even a mockingbird has its limits on what it can imitate but I'm sure it'd appreciate the effort too

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i mean, if you wanna go camping i could try it again
it sounds like you know how to put together a tent and everything

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well yeah
had to do that shit during the war

if you don't like nature, then it's not really going to work though I guess

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oh
right
yeah

i dunno maybe i just haven't had the right nature

[counterstep]

the
right
nature
?????

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yeah
nature with you in it

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you make it sound like I'm some kind of forest spirit or some shit

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are you
oh shit are you my totoro

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what

( he checks google. )


wait wait
is THIS a kink thing???

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you think a forest spirit from a kids movie is a kink thing?!

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idk??? you're the one that brought up trees being a kink??

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what?!?!
i thought we were gonna go camping and bone in the woods
maybe not though, not if there's gonna be bugs and shit

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yeah and that's what I thought the implication was so I was asking if it was a kink thing????

I'm so confused

look it's not that bad and big repellent exists okay like
please go camping with me
I would actually love to do that with you but only if you have fun
if you hate it, it's fine, I get it, we never have to go back okay