yeah. it's more of a brain color than red although neither are really internal organ-colored
[ it's okay bucky, alex wasn't that heavily invested in anti-pink slander. especially when he can go on a tangent... ]
yeah i dunno, i think if i had to pick my favorite color besides black, like color-color, it'd be yellow it's really in your face, yknow? like caution tape funny thing about yellow though is that nobody goes out of the way to pick it, so when you do, they're like "wow you must like yellow" like yeah my car is yellow, maybe i fuckin like it. i don't go up to people like "wow your favorite color must be dirt gray"
bones are also like a yellow white eggshell I guess and there are those blue veins and such, on the matter of just body colors
yellow is nice lively like the sun yellow isn't really an option for a lot of things though, so I think part of that is also just the people with money trying to dictate what people feel about colors what's your favorite animal then?
yeah well, they've been my favorite since i was kid and that means i'm not about to change it now name some of your favorites then, go can't lose since animals are better than people anyway
man it is genuinely funny how much you hate specifics at first it annoyed me, now it's funny, deadass
and look, it's not that i hate dogs i hate how hard it is to not be around dogs because everyone loves them and getting told i made up having a dog allergy as an excuse to, i dunno, be a killjoy because that's a normal fucking thing to lie about
nothing wrong with being indecisive for real, it's fine
but don't worry in case you were worrying i carry a ward against dogs otherwise i'd walk out into the city and just die lol but it doesn't make me wanna go hug a big ass st bernard to test the limit yknow
if you wanna know some super lame shit about me the first time i went to the hospital it's because when i was a kid i was playing with a dog and i stopped being able to breathe
I wouldn't mind helping facilitate, if you'd really want to, but obviously I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do if your throat starts closing up other than rush you to the hospital
I don't think that's lame though I'm sure it was really terrifying and confusing for you it always sucks if you're hurt by something you feel things for too
are you saying maybe to be funny or are you indecisive about being indecisive 🖤
yeah no exposure therapy shit for me i've got enough going on without fucking around with all that
but thanks lmao before anyone explained what the fuck happened i thought the dog cursed me and this was before i knew anything about paranormal shit, i just had an imagination
is there anything you believed as a kid that you look back on and laugh because it's so fuckin bonkers
I said maybe because I don't really agree with it being called indecisive and didn't want to argue about it
in some ways that would be true, wouldn't it? that you were cursed by the dog at least that's why it's not so difficult to imagine that people believed in those things through all of history and still today, even if they're more the fake sort of paranatural and not the real deal
Santa probably he's nowhere near as manufactured as he is today and it's not like I believed in the idea for long but I knew we always locked the door to the apartment at night for a reason and it wouldn't make sense to leave it unlocked for just one guy I do think he's probably real in another sense now though like as a cryptid or something
what do you call it? i'm not trying to argue or be an asshole i'm curious and sorry if i pissed you off tbc
but yeah, he's probably some kind of real or i wouldn't be surprised belief is what gives power to things y'know not in like a cutesy quote way but actually
funny story i'm not jewish-jewish but we did some of the holidays when baba was alive so we didn't do shit like christmas i don't even remember this but i guess i asked why santa hated us it made my mom cry, and then we had christmas every year lmao
idk some things just don't need to be decided. like what would you call needing to choose between a chocolate chip cookie and a cake right now with no actual consequence or result? it's a hypothetical but even if you choose one, both, or none, the result is really the same, isn't it? I'm just not sure why I have to pick specifics when the general statement sufficed and I love several kinds of each too why can't I like or want more than one thing either? I'm not mad just frustrated
yeah, that's what I think too sometimes believing has it's own power and knowing what that means is important
damn well that's one way to get Christmas to happen haha
i mean, yeah, you're right, the result is net zero, but i think it kind of says something about you? not that question in particular, all your choices i'm not a sociologist, i'm trying to think about this in realtime so if it sounds stupid that's why if we both chose cookie, cool, we have something in common if i choose cake and you choose cookie and you're like "i fuckin hate cake," then i'm like "damn maybe i better do something different for my birthday" if you choose a favorite animal maybe i know what to get your for YOUR birthday i'm just trying to learn about you and i guess not being able to pick made more sense to me than not caring
yeah well, we'll never know if i really believed santa hated us or if i was scheming my way to presents, but i feel like it could've gone either way 🤷🏻
that assumption means I hate the other thing if I don't pick it when maybe I'm just not in the mood for it right then though cause I happen to like both and now you've reduced my preferences to some static question where nuance doesn't exist it's the same with the animals and I happen to like a lot of things and now you're basically saying I'm not allowed to like thinks unless I can pick just one
( he's a bit too worked up now to go back to santa. )
what? that's not what i'm saying and i like cheesecake, it wasn't a parameter all that i'm trying to say is that i want to get to know you and i thought it was... i dunno, endearing, that you liked so many things you didn't want to choose i didn't mean to make it weird now i know to not ask you preferences, sorry
i guess i try too hard to understand things sometimes like, wanting an answer i can label and put somewhere in my brain i know a lot of stuff doesn't work like that, but i was trying to anyway that was stupid i'm sorry
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why pink? cause I said it was the inside of you?I didn't really know what color to pick, honestly( pink was also not a color men avoided in bucky's time. )
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although neither are really internal organ-colored
[ it's okay bucky, alex wasn't that heavily invested in anti-pink slander. especially when he can go on a tangent... ]
yeah i dunno, i think if i had to pick my favorite color besides black, like color-color, it'd be yellow
it's really in your face, yknow? like caution tape
funny thing about yellow though is that nobody goes out of the way to pick it, so when you do, they're like "wow you must like yellow"
like yeah my car is yellow, maybe i fuckin like it. i don't go up to people like "wow your favorite color must be dirt gray"
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bones are also like a yellow whiteeggshell I guess
and there are those blue veins and such, on the matter of just body colorsyellow is nicelivelylike the sunyellow isn't really an option for a lot of things though, so I think part of that is also just the people with money trying to dictate what people feel about colorswhat's your favorite animal then?no subject
and yeah that sounds about right for people with money
fuck them
i know you're not asking after all the time i spent talking your head off about sharks dude
great white all the way
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maybe notI figured you'd probably just pick something neon honestly
hey you never specifiedI knew you loved them a lot but that doesn't mean they're they top #1I love a lot of animals and I don't even have a #1no subject
yeah well, they've been my favorite since i was kid and that means i'm not about to change it now
name some of your favorites then, go
can't lose since animals are better than people anyway
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you say that but I'm pretty sure you won't like one of them as muchdogs cats birds wolvesvarious types of each
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at first it annoyed me, now it's funny, deadass
and look, it's not that i hate dogs
i hate how hard it is to not be around dogs because everyone loves them
and getting told i made up having a dog allergy as an excuse to, i dunno, be a killjoy
because that's a normal fucking thing to lie about
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I wouldn't say I hate themI just don't really know what I like maybe
not in the way people mean
( he did kind of lose track of how to be a person for a while there, so this isn't very strange to him. )
well I don't think you made it up or are a killjoy about dogsallergies can be genuinely awful and life threateningso they should be taken seriously
though also fuck those people who pretend to have them and waste precious resources on themselvesno subject
for real, it's fine
but don't worry in case you were worrying
i carry a ward against dogs otherwise i'd walk out into the city and just die lol
but it doesn't make me wanna go hug a big ass st bernard to test the limit yknow
if you wanna know some super lame shit about me
the first time i went to the hospital it's because when i was a kid i was playing with a dog and i stopped being able to breathe
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maybeI wouldn't mind helping facilitate, if you'd really want to, but obviously I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do if your throat starts closing up other than rush you to the hospitalI don't think that's lame thoughI'm sure it was really terrifying and confusing for youit always sucks if you're hurt by something you feel things for toono subject
🖤
yeah no exposure therapy shit for me
i've got enough going on without fucking around with all that
but thanks
lmao before anyone explained what the fuck happened i thought the dog cursed me
and this was before i knew anything about paranormal shit, i just had an imagination
is there anything you believed as a kid that you look back on and laugh because it's so fuckin bonkers
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I said maybe because I don't really agree with it being called indecisive and didn't want to argue about itin some ways that would be true, wouldn't it? that you were cursed by the dogat least that's why it's not so difficult to imagine that people believed in those things through all of history and still today, even if they're more the fake sort of paranatural and not the real dealSanta probablyhe's nowhere near as manufactured as he is today and it's not like I believed in the idea for long but I knew we always locked the door to the apartment at night for a reason and it wouldn't make sense to leave it unlocked for just one guyI do think he's probably real in another sense now thoughlike as a cryptid or something
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and sorry if i pissed you off tbc
but yeah, he's probably some kind of real
or i wouldn't be surprised
belief is what gives power to things y'know
not in like a cutesy quote way but actually
funny story
i'm not jewish-jewish but we did some of the holidays when baba was alive
so we didn't do shit like christmas
i don't even remember this but i guess i asked why santa hated us
it made my mom cry, and then we had christmas every year lmao
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idk some things just don't need to be decided. like what would you call needing to choose between a chocolate chip cookie and a cake right now with no actual consequence or result? it's a hypothetical but even if you choose one, both, or none, the result is really the same, isn't it? I'm just not sure why I have to pick specifics when the general statement sufficed and I love several kinds of each toowhy can't I like or want more than one thing either?I'm not madjust frustrated
yeah, that's what I think toosometimes believing has it's own power
and knowing what that means is importantdamnwell that's one way to get Christmas to happen hahano subject
not that question in particular, all your choices
i'm not a sociologist, i'm trying to think about this in realtime so if it sounds stupid that's why
if we both chose cookie, cool, we have something in common
if i choose cake and you choose cookie and you're like "i fuckin hate cake," then i'm like "damn maybe i better do something different for my birthday"
if you choose a favorite animal maybe i know what to get your for YOUR birthday
i'm just trying to learn about you and i guess not being able to pick made more sense to me than not caring
yeah well, we'll never know if i really believed santa hated us or if i was scheming my way to presents, but i feel like it could've gone either way 🤷🏻
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that assumption means I hate the other thing if I don't pick it when maybe I'm just not in the mood for it right then thoughcause I happen to like both and now you've reduced my preferences to some static question where nuance doesn't existit's the same with the animalsand I happen to like a lot of things and now you're basically saying I'm not allowed to like thinks unless I can pick just one( he's a bit too worked up now to go back to santa. )
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and i like cheesecake, it wasn't a parameter
all that i'm trying to say is that i want to get to know you
and i thought it was... i dunno, endearing, that you liked so many things you didn't want to choose
i didn't mean to make it weird
now i know to not ask you preferences, sorry
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that's not how you make it less weirdbut fine
whatever you think is bestno subject
i don't know or think anything
[ ^ title of his biography ]
i was trying to figure out how i fucked up
i went the wrong direction, i'm sorry
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can't things justexist as they are and not have to be something?
that's all I don't understandno subject
you're right, they don't have to be anything
i guess i try too hard to understand things sometimes
like, wanting an answer i can label and put somewhere in my brain
i know a lot of stuff doesn't work like that, but i was trying to anyway
that was stupid
i'm sorry
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sorry for being confusing and strangeI'll try not to be so messy
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bucky
buckington
james
i'm so messy i could be a toxic waste dump
i still like you
that's what i was trying to say the whole time, i just called you the wrong thing
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come on, you're notI'm not trying to haze you or something just cause I don't understandwe're still learningthat's all
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